NOVEMBER 06, 2009.
Early in the morning.
Most of the time, everything is fine because you put away what seems to be wrong. You focuse on what is happening right now in your life. You dismiss the bad possibilities, the bad events, the bad feelings. You try as hard as possible to be confident. And sometimes, you just need one single thing for your world to fall apart. One reminder of the past. One single event to come back from the grave. I am a happy person.
Nothing bad directly happened to me. But if I close my eyes, I see her big bright eyes. And I feel their grief. I am a happy person. But what is happening to her is not right. What is happening to them is unfair. I am a happy person, but I feel sad inside. Because I love her. Because she is my little princess. Because I don't want her to die. And I know that it might happen.